Concert turned into a tale of two glasses

In a recent column, David Keyes mentioned the Chamber Ambassadors' task of distributing a free wine glass to every ticket holder at the Festival's finale concert.

I was informed that in previous years, patrons got their hand stamped after receiving their goblet. Being my first year at this endeavor, I received direction from one of my fellow Ambassadors: "Be on the lookout for folks who make "return trips through the line." I was amused and said, "Nah, won't be many of those." Although her warning was delivered without humor, it wasn't long before we started experiencing what state highway patrolmen must go through every time they pull motorists aside for speeding: A litany of justification for receiving that coveted extra glass (One woman told me several of the glasses in her set at home were broken and she needed a new set).

After a while, as David related in his column, we started to have some fun and make people "report" to David as judge and jury. I did want to clarify a reference that David made: One lady stood in front of me and asked "May I have a glass?" to which I responded, "absolutely, enjoy." I turned back to the table to grab more glasses and when I turned, the same person stood in front of me and again, asked for a glass. Exasperated, I said to her, "You just got one!" Without missing a beat, she said, "Oh, that was my twin." I almost said something I would later regret but as I looked in the direction she was pointing, lo and behold, there was a gal with the genetically identical face. I thought, "I'll be darned" — and the Ambassadors shared a good laugh.

Another woman even had the chutzpah to gather up any glass that she thought had been abandoned by its owner. How do I know? Because she had her sweaty palm on my glass which still contained a little merlot (Someone might accuse me of dereliction of duty; I'd counter that it was in the interest of morale). She asked no one in particular, "Does this glass belong to anyone?" Indignantly, I indicated the glass in question was spoken for and that she should move on. Do you think she was put off? Hardly, without missing a beat she resumed her enthusiastic hunt for new quarry. I wonder if she gave a rip about the music or the fireworks?

Perhaps the best line of the night occurred as we had just about run out of glasses. A guy who identified himself only as Rodney stood there proudly exhibiting his stemware as if it were a trophy animal. Curious, I asked him why he was gloating so. His response: "I got a wine glass for my wife. Not a bad trade!"

PAUL KRAMES

Sandpoint