Thoughts on grieving, rejoicing and doing justice to both things

Last week at the close of Veteran’s Day — as I reflected on the day — it suddenly seemed extraordinary, as often happens when gratitude comes flooding in. It was a good day and I wrote it down for printing.

Since then I’ve learned that day ended tragically for an area family. A car accident taking the life of one and seriously injuring another. An incomprehensible devastating grief.

This is hard for me to reconcile — that a day could be wonderful for one person and hold inconsolable mourning for another. Somewhere inside it feels wrong to have joy when someone else is in such pain.

How does a person live life with all the sorrow going on? Years ago I learned that some people are “shock absorbers” within their families — feeling deeply — absorbing all the family’s pain. I think this occurs in larger ripples, too — experiencing grief for others about whom we hear, even others we don’t know.

This is the ability to empathize, to care. So much good comes from caring — it’s a lifeline for all of us. Without caring hearts we’d live hollowed out lives.

Where care takes a turn and becomes careful is when taking on too many griefs overcomes us. When they introduce a heaviness we aren’t meant to carry. It can happen almost without our knowing. The sense of loss for what people are going through is just so gripping.

The Bible speaks to this … “Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep.”

There’s no hypocrisy here. It’s saying be glad for the good things going on in our lives and the lives of others — but don’t neglect to care and cry and grieve with ones who are hurting.

At any given moment there are people rejoicing and people grieving. I can share in both without doing either one an injustice.