Reaching abuse survivors, one stone at a time

COEUR d’ALENE — When Lauren Holley’s relationship became abusive, she had nowhere to turn.

She had moved to Coeur d’Alene from Dallas in order to be with her child’s father, a move that left her without support from family or friends. Her partner installed hidden cameras inside their home, took her car and even her mail, and cut off her access to money.

Holley eventually contacted the police, who steered her toward Safe Passage Violence Prevention Center in Coeur d’Alene.

Advocates at Safe Passage helped Holley file for a protection order against her ex, which a court granted, and helped her and her child to leave their abusive home.

“They helped me find a place to move,” she said. “I had nothing. I owe a lot of my recovery and my journey to them.”

Haley Miller was a single mom in the middle of what she described as a “high-conflict” divorce when she became Holley’s neighbor.

“I was dealing with a lot of emotional and verbal abuse,” she said. “It was brutal.”

Through Holley, Miller learned about Safe Passage.

“I was so scared and Safe Passage was such a huge help,” she said.

Miller and Holley now volunteer with Safe Passage, helping provide the same resources that helped them to other abuse survivors.

“No one should ever feel like they’re stuck,” Holley said.

Holley and Miller spent Saturday at the Human Rights Education Institute with other Safe Passage volunteers and community members, painting rocks in honor of Domestic Violence Awareness Month.

Each rock is painted with a positive message and hidden somewhere in the Coeur d’Alene area for others to find. On the back of each rock is Safe Passage’s contact information.

“Our hope is that people who need us will find these rocks,” said Leslie Johnson, director of development and communication for Safe Passage.

Johnson described a local domestic violence survivor who walked into Safe Passage last year, painted rock in hand, asking for help. If even one more person does the same, it will have been worth all the effort and more.

Safe Passage provides free, confidential resources, support and crisis intervention to people affected by domestic and sexual abuse, stalking and human trafficking. Services include a 24-hour hotline, an emergency shelter, legal advocacy, counseling, prevention education and more.

More than 1,600 people in the five northern counties reached out to Safe Passage last year, Johnson said. Every day, Safe Passage Children’s Advocacy Center serves a child who has experienced sexual or domestic abuse.

Safe Passage provides help and resources to anyone experiencing abuse, regardless of age or gender.

“Men are abused, too,” Johnson said. “We serve everyone.”

Advocates like Bobbi Bild stand ready to help survivors at any hour of the day or night. A former nurse who has volunteered with Safe Passage for about seven years, Bild has fielded countless 3 a.m. phone calls and hurried to the hospital to meet with sexual assault survivors.

She’s not there to interview the survivor or conduct physical exams. That’s for police and hospital staff to do. Instead, Bild is there to advocate for the survivor and provide whatever support she can.

“I’ve held people’s hands while they have their procedure done,” she said. “Others just wanted me to be there.”

Bild always stays with survivors until she’s sure they’re in safe hands.

“I’m there until they find their way home,” she said.

Reach Safe Passage 24/7 by calling 208-664-9303 or texting 208-449-7228.

This story has been updated for clarity.

Info: www.safepassageid.org.